The Mystery Can

So lately every time I try to blog it takes forever for the words I type to come up on screen and then the lights flash off and on. Someone powerful does not want me to bring you the quality absurdity anymore. I fight the power, exercise my First Amendment rights, and bring you..... THE MYSTERY CAN!

A hundred cheeseburgers!

So there's at least one regular reader whom I know will appreciate this post. The premise is simple: drunk Asian kids in Vegas, apparently inspired by Harold of "Harold and Kumar" fame, decide to take on the (evidently legendary though, til now, presumed apochryphal) In-n-Out 100 x 100: 100 patties, 100 slices of cheese.
I only wish I had had some part in this, planning or execution. Well played, drunken Asian kids! An extra-special kudos to the man in the leather pants!

Good Luck, suckas

Dear University of Wisconsin library system:

Please be advised that you will get the copy of the "Marx-Engels Reader" (that I snatched up on the first day of school before anyone else could think of it, riding my bike home in the bitter cold with all my books PLUS the "Reader," swerving due to the extra book weight, and have since filled with post-it flags scribbled with marginalia in preparation for my qualifying exams, and which some douchebag has apparently "recalled," having lacked my foresight) when you pry it from my cold, dead hands. How dare you even ask? That sucka's mine until May 30, 2006. SUCK IT.

Scientist Humor

Well shit, dude. I was just sayin'

Ah, Ray Smuckles

The White Flecks are Flavor

So here's a new discovery, "Starvin' With Lou" Lou is an ex-bouncer and ex-chef who shows the good people of Brighton, MA how to eat for cheap. The link leads you into a dark tunnel of Luau Spam Burritos. At $4.00 per, you're better off hitting up Anna's for a CVB.

Blogworthy

sooooo, my blog hiatus has been entirely justified, as there has been nothing blog-worthy in some time. Following a marathon walk with pups, however, I returned to find that several streets have been blocked off and the Homeland Security Team called in, so that's a good time. Apparently some guy dropped a "suspicious package" into the sewer and we're all going to die. I hope we can survive until evening, though, because my neighbors are having me over for bouillabaise.

Anyway, I love Madison for its Sesame Street feel. During the walk I stopped by my favorite store, the glitter workshop on East Johnson, to pick up a dainty little necklace for tomorrow night's, er, date. Miss Heather, the owner, and I began chatting about our fattitude and love of beer, and she mentioned to me a new weekly event, namely:

Mondays at Mickeys:

OK. Monday nights suck here at Mickey's. Seriously- It's like a fucking
graveyard up in here.

So here's my idea.

A Weekly record party/service industry night. Service industry folks get
$2 shots and $2 taps and Local musicians and scenesters come in and play
music from 10-1:45.

I'm looking to get enough people involved to have three people come down
a week, and a cast of 12-15 regulars. That way you'll only have to
commit to an hour a month. If you're interested in coming down to the
best damn bar in town and playing some music, I'd love it if you would
respond. (If you have names of folks who you think would be good, please
please please give me their email addresses or phone numbers.)

I can't afford to pay you, but I'll definitely make sure you drink free
while you're playing your records/CDs/iPod.

Let me know ASAP, because we're on life support here.